It's all in how you Think About it

We hosted Thanksgiving.

We bought a car.

Said car got hit by something and the bumper was shattered.

We’d had the thing a week.

One week!

Our toilet broke.

Which led to too much water going out leading to a bursting pipe.

On a Saturday.

Before Nick left for Canada.

Does anyone else love the holidays or is it just me?

I wish the holidays were just one big Hallmark movie…unfortunately this is how our holidays usually end up…spousal arguements in whispered shouting while purusing home depot aisles for a wax toilet ring.

Not to mention that the AT&T promotional period ended.

Again.

And you thought adulting was going to be fun.

There are so many times when I lay awake in bed, honked off at how the week, month, day has gone.

If such and such hadn’t happened we would be ahead this month. How are we again this far behind? Goals aren’t hit, max contributions aren’t met, and again we want to slam our heads against the wall in frustration…

And yet, there are so many things to be thankful for.

There are four hearts beating through the night every night. We all wake up warm, happy, well fed, and dressed. There is no fear of where our meals will come from. No terror about our coming day. We are together and happy and free.

And for me that is what I need to remember.

Y’all when I have toilet problems it lies within the simple fact that we have running water into the house and INDOOR plumbing!

When I whine about my new Lincoln’s bumper being a sight, it really doesn’t matter because, one, thank you Lord for insurance despite the pricey deductible, and two, the car still runs! We have transportation and heat and heated seats and self defrosting mirrors.

I could go on and on.

The point I am trying to make is that in society I feel we have become so near-sighted to our problems that we miss the big picture of being humble and grateful and decidedly choosing joy amidst minor set backs in life.

So I’m leaving you all with these thoughts so I can go bail more water out of the toilet (it’s my turn y’all)…think upon what is good and lovely in life. Dwell on those thoughts. Let them seep into your soul. Let God fill you with his peace and joy and goodness. Pure goodness. Life will be okay. God’s got this. God’s got you, girl.

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“Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.”

— Philippians 4:8

Quick Travel Update: Tennessee, Indy, and Beyond!

Hi sweet friends!

We have been around the big blue yonder! This post is unlike my normal posts because I am just dishing about my life. Which by the way, feels so nice!

The last few weeks have been crazy!

We ended October traveling together to Kentucky, Ohio, Tennessee, North Carolina, and Georgia. We landed home just in time for some good old trick or treating through our neighborhood and then it was back out for more fun on the go.

Last week we found ourselves tourists in Indianapolis…we had a blast and it was fun being touristy as that was where Nick and I first lived when we got married. It was fun to check out new places and to reminisce about the old.

Now we are back home and I feel that I am trying as hard as I can to get my bearings before the fun of the holidays kicks in. I find that this is the time of year that makes or breaks the holiday season. Not having a clean and organized home before everything picks up can turn the fun into chaos in a heart beat. Trust me, I know from experience!

So I am here sifting through the piles of laundry, organizing our attic area to make way for a gift wrapping station, and purging toys and clothes that we no longer need in an effort to make room for the new we know will be coming from friends and family.

It is so easy to become overwhelmed or even bitter through all of this…I’ve been there. But I just want you to know, we are all so blessed! Me, you, everyone! This time of year with the leaves colored gem colors it is so obvious how God give way above and beyond what we need. He gives to us so we will be happy and content and joy-filled!

I hope this leaves you inspired to find contentment in your chaos, to be grateful for the grunge your kiddos bring in, and to seek out the serenity of the every day!

I love you all!

These Items Help Make Learning Awesome!

Over the years we have fine tuned what works for us and what doesn’t.

This past year we took our very large homeschool room up on our third floor and moved it down to our den, located on the first floor. This took an enormous amount of time and thought as we sifted through each item on hand to determine its value in our classroom. After all, we moved our classroom into a much smaller space and which thereby dictated that everything needed a justification for its use of precious real estate in the footprint of the room.

It was really hard and took me a really, really long time (think 9 months, ugh). In the end though I am left with what really works, what we love, and what is useful to what we are studying. For a girl who always liked to have one thing on hand, then another if the first didn’t work, and then maybe something else, this was a struggle.

But now we have on hand things that work well for us and things that we love to use. (at least I love to use, something the kids would just like to not do school, teehee).

A few of you have asked me for some recommendations on things to buy so here they are in no particular order:

Light Up Timer

This is amazing for showing your kids how much time they have. It also gets you off the hook for having to track your kiddos time (or am I the only one who randomly forgets to keep track of the time only to announce, “two more minutes” when your kids ask how much time they have left?). It has a yellow zone so you can set it to give a ____ more minutes left until time is up. This is a much needed feature for our son and it’s really helped.

Multiplication Bracelets

We used these when we were practicing skip counting and now we use them when going over our multiplication facts. I will randomly give the kids these when we are not working on our facts and ask what number all of the bracelet numbers are multiplied by.

Drawing Workbook

This workbook has been in our house for years and for good reason…it’s amazing! When we practice the OiLs method of drawing with Classical Conversations I pull this out but we use it at other times as well. There’s a little story that tells about the animals you draw and there are stickers to use as well (we’ve actually never used those, just the story and the drawing).

HP Printer Connected Ink

Okay, I love our printer! We have had it for about 3 years and it is hands down the best printer we’ve ever had. We decided to take advantage of the HP Connected program. If you don’t know what that is, basically it’s a subscription program for your ink. You sign up for how many pages per month you use and they send you ink when you need it. It is so easy. You can send them back your old cartridges to be recycled and that’s it. It is so easy. I was always running out of ink and pinnacle moments when I didn’t have time to run to Staples for more ink and now I don’t even have to think about it.

Tichonderoga Pencils

We have tried so many pencils. When we started homeschooling (8 years ago!!!) I was a mom who would buy the Target Dollar Section everything to match and it was in theory so much fun! Except the pencils would always break like it was their job and that part wasn’t so fun. Through trial and error I realized that Tichonderoga Pencils really are worth the money. If you have a chewer like me you should also invest in some eraser tops because the eraser will be gone long before the pencil is short so with the erasers you can keep using the pencil.

Sticker Charts

You can get any you would like but I have the ones that we have linked so you can see what I am talking about. These are a great incentive for good attitudes about school and diligence with our work. I give a sticker for each day the kids get their work done without complaining and have good attitudes. Sometimes I will give the chart a set prize value “trip to the froyo place” or I will give it a monetary amount, usually about $5. This gives them something attainable to feel that they have achieved each day. Plus we like to use the little treats when we have a break from school and we remind them what their hard work has earned them.

Fidgets

We used fidgets long before fidget spinners were the craze and we have never used those. Instead I look for quiet things their little hands can play with while we are reading outloud, working on poetry, or whenever else they want to play with them. In my mind fidgets can be anything that keeps their hands busy…so crochet, weaving, playdough, anything could be considered a fidget, right? I love having different things on hand for them to play with (get it, on hand! Eh? Eh?!)

These are the things that are working for us to make our year awesome! If you have any other recommendations I would love to hear them! We are always looking for new things. I will have to learn to recycle things through with our new classroom rather than just hoard everything. I’m excited for the challenge though and hope it will keep us engaged as we will keep only what we love and move through things we are finished with.

Happy learning!

Planning our Trip to Georgia

I shared before how I plan our family roadtrips in order to get the most out of them for the least amount of money.

I wanted to share with you now how I am planning our next trip to Georgia.

I chart our route and looked for larger cities that we will be passing through.

I see that we are going through Lexington, Kentucky and Knoxville, Tennessee. I have nothing relatable in my head about either one of those places (do you guys? Do I just live too sheltered of a life?) so I Pinterest them to see what there is to do.

It looks like in Lexington there are some horse race type parks to check out but nothing that is screaming “us” so I’m moving on. I will also point out Lexington is about 4 hours from our house. I want to make sure we cover some distance in the first day of our trip so Lexington is about the closest place I would be willing to go to. Otherwise we’ll have too much traveling to do the next day as we make our way to Georgia.

So the next place I’m going to look up is Knoxville.

There look to be some things but I am not sure if that is where I want to be for very long. We are after all driving through so we don’t have a lot of time to spend.

I now check out our memberships’ reciprocal programs. We have memberships through the ASTC and the AZA. I see that there is a zoo in Knoxville that looks promising but we still have to pay 50%. That’s a great deal, don’t get me wrong, but I just want to make sure that that is something we commit to do with our time. After all, a zoo takes a large chunk of time to go through.

I check out the National Parks website and, duh! I see that Knoxville is just a hop, skip and a jump a way from the Smoky Mountains National Park. BINGO!

I think we might go that way. We love hiking and exploring so going that route ensures lots of fresh air, exercise, and it’s darn near free.

In case you’ve never been to the Smoky Mountains, it is near Gatlinburg and Pigeon Forge. This is a really neat area but a huge tourist area that makes it really hard to stay on budget. I am sure we will do some things there but we try to steer clear of this area. An example of the area is when we went mini golfing. We went to a scabby kind of place with flaking paint and it was $60 for the four of us. Seriously. That is why we try to plan carefully what we do in the area and we look for budet friendly items.

The Smoky Mountains park spans over 800 square acres over North Carolina and Tennessee. While it is technically one park there are several sections and areas of the park including Cades Cove, Cataloochee, Clingmans Dome, and more. While there are lots of things to do I think we are going to be focusing on the Cades Cove area.

Cades Cove offers some of the best opportunities to spot wildlife. When we’ve been through the Smokies before we have spotted deer, bears, elk, and coyotes. We like Cades Cove because of the settlement you can explore as well as the nature. We’ve never had a lot of time to explore the area though, so I think that will be a perfect option for us.

We are so excited for our trip and can’t wait to get to the mountains!!!

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I hope this kind of “me talking outloud to you helps you to see the madness behind my method for planning our trips. I can try to do this with another trip if it helps you! Let me know, friends!

The Top 5 Buys for a New Homeowner

My sister bought a house! We’re so excited for her! It is such a rewarding experience to purchase your very own home!!!

We’ve been homeowners for about 14 years now but every time I help someone move it’s amazing to me how much stuff you find out you need. Here are some things that I recommend if you are looking for something to get someone who has just moved.

A cool new key chain

On closing day the homeowner gets all kinds of new keys…surprise them with a new key ring to make their day!

A trash can

I don’t know why but whenever someone moves they need a new trash can. I don’t know why. It’s science.

Dish Soap

Instantly you’re going to want to wash your dishes when you unpack so get someone some new cleaning supplies, a new sponge and dish soap.

Toilet Paper

It’s not any fun to have people help you move and then realize you don’t have any toilet paper in your new house.

Vacuum Cleaner

Think how happy it will make a new homeowner to surprise them with a new vacuum cleaner! I know when we bought our first place we didn’t have an adequate vacuum for an entire house.

What We Found in Mississippi

This summer we were able to travel with Nick down to Mississippi on a business trip. 

I feel the need to tell you that if you are thinking of going to Mississippi in the smack dab middle of the summer and you’re wondering if it will be hot the answer is…um, yes.  Most decidedly yes!  The heavens declare the answer is yes.  If you find me I will be screaming yes!  It was hot, humid, bug filled, and pretty miserable weathere wise.

Since we are on a journey to have the children visit each state we decided to go. I say that because of the nature of Nick's work it doesn't often lead us to popular destinations but rather smack dab into rural America. While I would have loved to travel down to the coast or over to the river bank, we only went as far as the North Eastern corner of the state.

We stayed in Starkville which is home to Mississippi State.  It is a GIGANTIC campus!  If you are looking for some big whoppin’ school to go to with humidity and flying, biting insects then have I got a place for you!

You know me, I try to find fun things to do when we go places. I am a big believer that even if you’re in the backwoods of a state there is still so much to see.   The culture and the people can be such a learning experience and such a joy when we get away from the chain restaurants and actually steep ourselves in the lives of the people we’re surrounded by. This is how we have fun in our family.

However, it proved difficult in Starkville. Very. difficult.

Nothing.

Nothing.

Nothing.

There was nothing to do. Being there for 5 days I found 1 park, a second hand store, and 2 ice cream stores that were nice. That’s it. The people were sweet but the town proved to have nothing to do with children.

Aren’t you glad you’re here to read this riveting post?

That being said, we were in Starkville for near a week so I had to find something else for us to do. 

Thankfully I came across the cutest little town just a short drive away. 

The town was Columbus, Mississippi and we loved going there!

If you ever get a chance to go to this town I highly recommend it!  On top of being the birthplace of Tennessee Williams, almost all of the homes are antebellum.  SO many gorgeous neighborhoods and homes to discover and gaze at.  The story goes that during the civil war the town saw the writing on the wall so to speak and became a hospital town , saving the town from inevitable destruction.

Check out of these houses…

Gorgeous, right?

As I’ve mentioned before, I am a history lover and my husband has a degree in architecture so old houses are our love language.  We even hunted this house, Waverly Plantation Mansion, down that is in the middle of nowhere. The picture is a touch blurry because it was already closed when we arrived so this photo was taken through the fence.

Another city in Mississippi we were able to enjoy was Tupelo. Birthplace of Elvis Presley, this place is steeped in history and respect for the king.  

Here is the house that Elvis grew up in. It was very eye opening. I’m always trying to compensate for the smallness of our lake cottage, warning people about the size, and, my word, this place is way smaller than ours.   

Not to mention that this was his only house, not his vacation property.  

It made for some great discussions with the children on how it doesn’t really matter how or where you start out. You can follow your dreams no matter what.  It’s all about drive people, your drive.

Over all we had an amazing time in Mississippi, but I’ve got to be honest, we did have to do some digging to find some off the beaten path-places. We had a great time and through all of the hard work I feel like we got a really honest look at Mississippi, not a shined up, best look for tourist kind of vision.

How I Plan Our Family Roadtrips

One of the biggest questions I get from readers and from friends is how I plan our trips: how do I find activities for us to do; how do we find such cool things to do.  How do I find things that people would never know about. 

Well sit right down and let me tell ya how I do it. 

Right now I am in the midst of planning for our next trip so I thought now was a PERFECT time to share with you my method (or my madness?) of planning and creating our itinerary.   

I first feel that I should tell you that I am not an expert.  I am just a mom, who educates her kids, so I look for ways to take advantage of our travel to be able to teach our kiddos more than I could at home: to immerse them in cultures and history that are rich where we visit.  I am also a mom of a one-income family so the word budget is practically tattooed on my forehead.  I say that to let you know that most of what we do is either free or pretty darn cheap.  All in all, I say that to let you know that if you are here looking for how to plan your next big trip with all of the bells and whistles, then honey, you are lookin’ in the wrong place.

Google Maps

So the first thing I do is to map out our route with google.  Is this too hard for you?  I realize this is a very complicated step, ha.

Hang in there.

I make a note of obvious places/things we want to experience.  In this past year we went to Mississippi (a post is coming about that next week!) and we drove through Memphis, Tennessee to get there.  Obviously when I think Memphis things pop into my mind…Elvis, blues, barbeque.  So I had a base of what I knew we could do while we there.

Pinterest

Next, I Pinterest the crap out of any cities that we are passing through that look like they may be large-ish (like Mephis).  I find that, in most instances, teeny towns with populations of 500 and one gas station usually are not the ideal locations for museum stops and aren’t large pulls for attention. That’s not to say that there isn’t ever anything to do but for things to see when we are traveling through and on a time crunch, I skip small towns..

So like I said, I pin away.  This gives me a general feel of what there is to do in that area and how popular the place is.  I’m also just casually feeling out what pins are coming up.  If I am getting nothing but pins on the best pub crawls and night clubs in a certain city than I start to wonder if there is indeed anything for kids to do.  Believe it or not but there are actually quite a few places in the US that do not cater to children. It’s almost like they are not welcome…at all. 

I pin all of those things on my pinterest board and then move on to…

Memberships

I pull the membership cards I have to museums, zoos, gardens, whatever and I look up the reciprocal lists.  Almost all memberships offer a reciprocal list of some kind to places that are either free or discounted for you to go to.  I pull these lists up and look for places that would be a good fit for us to go.  You guys, Emma and Cal are now 10 and 12, so let’s be honest, sadly we are no longer spending every waking moment glued to zoos. It doesn’t make sense for me to plan 4,000 zoos for us to visit.  We will sometimes visit one and that is about enough for us at this stage of childhood/awkward tweenishness.  Right now my kids are loving anything with more complicated science experiments so I look for science museums, children’s museums, and the like.  It’s just up to what your kids are loving.  I make sure to also plan according to how we will be spending the day.  If we’ve spent 8 hours cramped in the car then making them go somewhere where it’s quiet and we’re just observing will probably not be a good fit.  Rather, for that instance I’m going to look for somewhere they can burn off some energy and maybe explore a bit on their own.

Junior Ranger

Our kids have Junior Ranger vests from the National Parks, and are almost fiendish about earning new badges.  Since most National Parks and Monuments are free, I will search for some around our route for us to visit.  I REALLY advocate for this program because we have to teach the future generation to protect and preserve our land, and Nick and I learn just as much as, and probably enjoy it more than, the kids.

Pinterest…Again

After going through all of these steps, writing down places I want to go to, see, I then go back to the Pinterest board and actually OPEN the pins I have (how many of you pin the live long day but seldom actually LOOK at the pins?  Is that just me?).  I look for activities to do that will be memorable for the children.  Obviously you know what your kids like and what they don’t.  When we went to Memphis I was wanting the kids to experience the whole Elvis craze but let’s be real, they couldn’t care two flips about The King.  So spending $40 a pop on tickets was not a reasonable thing for us to do.  Plus I know that dragging our autistic son through a place with all kinds of things you shouldn’t touch, is often a bad idea.  Equipped with this knowledge I set out for less expensive sights like a restaurant Elvis liked to frequent, statues of The King, etc.  This gave them a sense of his purpose in the community, it helped them to see the enormity of him through statues, but also through seeing his favorite diner the fact that he was just a person.  They now know about him without us spending a whole ton of time and money on the experience. win-win.

Places to Eat

After I have activities planned out, I go ahead and look for fun places to eat.  When we go to regions of the country I search our local food for the children to eat. And for us to eat, who am I kidding here? It’s not all about the kids!  I want them to know that not everyone eats like people in Indiana, and that’s okay.  I want them to experience foods they might not have tried otherwise and to understand that people have different tastes.  My kids are not fond of okra but they’ve at least tried it in many forms.  They know okra, they’ve tried okra, they’ve experienced okra. We’re at peace with the Okra.

I would like to take this moment for a brief public service announcement on the importance of planning where you are going to eat.  Here is why: 1) then you can plan your budget for your meal 2) you have a game plan BEFORE the family is starving 3) you won’t end up at McDonald’s for every meal because you just had to pick something when everyone was hungry and snarky, ending up spending a small fortune on food that makes you feel horrible afterwards. 4) The really good places are hardly ever out in the open. It’s just a fact of life.  The truly great places to eat are hidden in the basements of buildings, the back alleys, the places you wouldn’t notice when you’re just casually driving around looking for a restaurant. 

So plan where you want to eat. 

Okay, that’s how I plan our trips when we are still at home.  When we arrive in an area I will hunt down more information in tourism magazines and rack cards.   Search them out in your hotel lobby, in the vestibule at Cracker Barrel, anywhere. These little gems of old school advertising are how you find out about fun things like the world’s largest pistachio! or the largest metal tribute to the Trail of Tears. Whatever it is, it’s likely you can find it on a rack card somewhere.

My last how I plan is one I’ve had to really hone. I almost didn’t write about it because it’s embarrassing, but here it goes…

Don’t be so uptight. If you pull into a city and your kids don’t want to do what you have planned, then don’t. Or if you drive by a sign for something that sounds really fun then go do that and scrap your plans.

For the longest time I was so tightly wound about what we had to do I was like a drill sergeant when it came to vacations. But I found that when I was like that the kids weren’t having any fun. When I would force them to go somewhere they would complain the entire time and then no one would have any fun.

I am not sure if this because I had the world’s whiniest kids (probably not) or what, but I find it’s best to try to do things that most of the family loves. Granted I am not a mother who caters to every single thing my children may or may not want to do.

Like, I love hiking. My kids despise it. Over the years I’ve been able to say, “this is something I really want to do” and they at least tolerate it without complaining. I know that once they are out there hiking they will have fun because they always do. And if you can’t say that to your kids then maybe it’s because mine are almost teenagers, so hang in there!

I hope this helps you guys! I love planning trips. I know some people hate it but I adore it and find it a really fun challenge.

Happy planning, sweet friends!

What If...

A couple of weeks ago I bore my soul to y’all about my decision to be happy. It was really hard and took me WAY out of my comfort zone to share that.

But I’m so glad I did.

Sharing a part of myself with everyone has been brutal on my emotions, but it has also been so redeeming. It has taught me so many things about everyone. First of all, I had so many people reach out to me with a combined voice to say that I was saying exactly what was on their heart as well.

It is so nice to know I am not alone and heartbreaking at the same time to know that we women have been listening to the voices within for far too long.

It makes me wonder when did this all start and what if we hadn’t listened to the voice at all?

What if…

What if we all stopped looking at exercise as something we have to do? What if we started looking at it as something we get to go? How radical would that change your world? I found a class I LOVE that is combination of Pilates and yoga. It stretches me mentally and physically. It works me until I’m sore and I adore going to this class. It is my me time.

What if we stopped looking at clothes in a way that we have to cram ourselves into a certain number or we are doomed? I spent too much time trying to cram my body into a size that wasn’t reasonable. Once I gave up and started dressing to cover my body in enough fabric that I didn’t look like I was trying to win a sausage race, I discovered I looked better and was actually comfortable!

via GIPHY

What if we stopped degrading ourselves as mothers if we put our feet up and read the magazine? What if we started looking at that as needed time of self-preservation.

What if we stopped and looked at the sky, or the way the leaves move in the breeze? What if we stayed there for 10 minutes? What if worship comes in acknowledging the creator of all these things?

What if we start acknowledging things for what they are when they are sucking our soul dry to the very marrow we cling to for life? What if we sought out things of beauty that our souls were made to crave, made to love, made to need? What if we filled our homes with soft music, fresh flowers, and flickering candles, just for ourselves and our love of the beauty it invokes into our true selves through each sense?

What if we taught our children that cleaning the house or studying math or memorizing sonnets was not some gloom and doom situation but was rather a chance to take care of the kingdom, to take a glimpse at the handiwork of God in creating this universe? What if we cracked open a book of difficult literature or studied works of art as part of a journey to catch a glimpse of the face of our creator carved through the works of His created beings?

What if we strove to understand the bible and his ideas, not so we can check off our “devotion” checkbox but so we can sit at the feet of God and bask in his life giving light? What if we fed off of his truths? What if we hung to the very word of God, the red inked letters in the manuscript of love as much as we cling to the Pinerest worthy quotes that mere mortals say about God?

What if we all actually believed the bible? What if we all didn’t internally kind of roll our eyes at the verses we’ve come to know from the beginning of our churched lives but actually took them to heart and coveted their meaning? What if we hid their words in our heart, words like HE CREATED US IN HIS IMAGE? Would listening to those words have helped me to block out the voice in my head? If I had not only hidden his word in my heart, not simply etched it into my being but gouged it into my very existence, could I have fought off the true enemy who brings words of scorn and deceit and disdain?

Certainly.

There are so many what ifs in life.

What if we all joined together today to spread love and not hate, to build other women up instead of clawing them down?

What if?

New Duds for Mom

How are y’all doing in your year so far? I know I’ve reached the point where the newness of the homeschool year has worn off and I am starting to wonder if we can make it until Fall Break.

You guys, I've reached my upper-mid thirties. 

Gulp.

Don't tell anyone, okay? 

I feel as if age doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things but in life I can certainly tell that I am starting to act my age. 

Like in matters of apparel.  I get why my grandma, who is 92 now, insists on wearing the same  style of slippers that she's worn since before I can remember...comfort. 

Comfort, people, comfort. 

Which often times makes it hard to be cute and stylish when you just want to crawl into some kind of ball made out of terry cloth and stay there forever. 

But I can't...you know, because, kids. 

Outside of being a mom I am also a director of some camps, a teacher, and a wife, so you know, there are those things. 

And can we just add to it I'm also a lady on a budget?...that's right everyone, I said it.  Money doesn't grow on trees over here.  There's no dollar fairy in these woods.  Despite my many hats we're basically a one income family and that means there are sacrifices people, Sacrifices!

What does sacrificing mean, you may ask?  Well, it means I hone in on one thing to get rather than the 20 on my list of wants.  It's hard.  Cough, cough.  Some day my old self will thank me when there's something in that retirement fund so I can buy fancy slippers like Grandma Jean. 

In the meantime here are some things that I buy when I want to spruce up the old wardrobe.  These are items I have purchased in the last year, here and there.  But they've been total game changers for my wardrobe. Also, I may add that all of these things can really spruce up any denim jumper and they are all me-approved for doing all of the weird things that us homeschooling moms find ourselves do…from mixing chemistry projects to running kids to sports to teaching math to rolling around on the floor playing to vacuuming to…well, the list goes on and on.

Adidas leather sneakers

You guys listen, they didn’t fail us in middle school and they won’t fail us now. There are also canvas options but I went for leather because I am not Martha Stewart with an entourage of people to assist in making my sneaks look great. I know I will walk through anything and everything and the leather makes it easy to wipe clean and press on.

I have a pair of these and I’ve found that I can wear them with so many things. Tee shirts of course but sweaters, skirts, dresses, you name it. They really add a sense of fun to my outfit I wouldn’t normally have had with the clothes I wear them with and they are seriously comfortable.

Anything from Evy's Tree...seriously, anything 

I have been such a fan of their clothing for years. It was only within the past two years or so that I got wise to their sales. They have these amazing garments, primarily really comfortable sweatshirt creations, that I salivate over and try to justify in my mind but most (no, all) of the time we just can’t spend over $100 for a sweatshirt.

However, their sales are amazing! If you wait and watch you can score some awesome sauce deals! For example my latest order was last month…I ordered a tee of theirs, a sweater, and an amazing sweatshirt top for under $50.

A cute bag 

I love bags. I have a problem but yes, I love bags. TJ Maxx is a great place to get a great deal. Or Amazon for the beauty above which won’t break your bank and comes in a bunch of colors. Wherever you get a bag, the things to remember is to get a bag that works for you and you don’t have to break the bank to get a cute new purse.

If you need some recommendations of my faves you can read my blog all about them if you missed it.

Earrings

This is something that is so simple and yet such a game changer.

Truly, you guys!

Find some earrings and pair them with an unexpected outfit. Or buy some new ones and try those out with an outfit you are really tired of. They help to change things up and to frame your beautiful face.

Starfish Pants from Lands End 

There are not many things in this life that I have one, brand specific piece I would recommend. But leggings are when I am different.

These pants are life.

One of the amazing things about these pants is the thickness of the fabric, the breathability, and the fact that they can be worn for anything…from working out to working in the office, they are just that amazing!

I wear the Starfish slim leg pants but they also have the original cut, leggings, jeans, and even crops. So comfortable!

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Ladies, listen to me, I know money is tight when you’re homeschooling but it is so important to treat yourself, even if it’s something small. It helps with your sanity, it helps you to feel like the special woman you are, not just a wife and mother, with constant demands on you day in and day out.

Find a way to treat yourself!

My Big Decision

This is a hard post to write.

I’m about to get real here. And real is so hard to put out into the world.

Here we go, a bit of my heart out in the world…

I have spent the majority of my life hating myself. No, that’s not even accurate…loathing myself. I feel that loathing is a deeper feeling than simply hatred and so I’ve chosen that word to describe the feelings towards myself.

For about 20 years I have wanted to change my appearance. I grew up being told what was wrong with me. In every single way. And so somehow, slowly, in every way, that became ingrained in each fiber of my soul.

It was with this feeling of inadequacy that I began a comprehensive list of what was wrong with me. When I was 16 I was sure if I could be thinner boys would like me. In college, if I could pay for plastic surgery to remove the dimple on my nose left by the scarring of a severe case of chicken pox, then, oh then, I would have a real chance at being a knockout. When I met Nick things became better and worse at the same time. A juxtaposition of deep emotions surfaced. I had found someone who loved me just as I was because that was how God made me. And oh, it felt amazing. But it felt so distant and unfamiliar. So my list making continued but more in the light of “I would be worthy of my boyfriend/then fiance/then husband if _________” was different about me.

Don’t get me wrong, I was told that God loved me in the Bible and through all of the church leaders I experienced, but I was sure He could love me more if I was a better person, a better version of myself, if I could have more self control or more of a regimented beauty routine, take care of my temple better so he would be prouder of me.

Flash forward to a 30ish year old version of me…a person who has spent the vast majority of life trying to change. Trying to become pretty, insistent that if I could just get my butt in gear I could be a different person. I could be the me I’m supposed to be. I dieted to any nutritionist’s hearts content. I worked out daily (read that as DAILY!!!!) for months on end and nothing happened except gaining weight and backne. I was done for.

I went to the doctor, insistent that something was wrong with me…insistent I must have a basketball sized growth that weighed the same as a small child somewhere within me. But bloodwork came back shockingly that I was abnormally healthy. And my doctor had a serious talk with me… “maybe you’re just the size you’re supposed to be. To me you look like a healthy hawaiian woman.” Ouch I thought. How insulting. I’ll show him.

Although at this point in our story I’m pretty much out of options…every diet has not worked, paleo made me feel healthy but not skinnier, trim healthy mama made me feel glowing but again, not skinnier, and working out added muscles (the horror!)

I’ve seen specialists, nutritionists, trainers, and more.

In the most recent chunk of time I came home from our summer cottage and joined a new diet program thinking…this is it! I’m going to be a new person! People will like me! I’ll be amazing! But I found myself feeling horrible and unable to function at any point needed to to be a good wife and mother. Worse than that…I still was not losing any weight.

I started reading some things that I believe God put in my path to pave the way for me. I started thinking how nice it would be to experience the “joy” fruit of the spirit, to be happy despite my circumstances and how great it would feel to be content. Truly content. After all of these thought I was tired of not being happy with myself. I realized if I was ever going to be happy I had to make a change.

So a few weeks ago I sent my husband a text message:

Be honest, are you really happy with me? Just as I am? Be honest!

He responded:

Yes, I love you just as you are.

So I decided I could too.

Those few weeks ago I had this aha moment (or a duh moment depending on how your glass is filled/emptied in your view of life) that I had spent the vast majority of my life hating myself…no, loathing myself. And I was tired of it.

I was done with not being content. I had always associated the word contentment with money and material possessions but the bottom line was that I had my health and all of these amazing aspects of my life and yet I was finding no contentment based solely on my physical appearance.

I found myself thinking…

What would happen if I consciously made decisions about what I put in my body to eat based on what was the very best for my actual health and not for my diet?

What would happen to my soul if I decided that I am not who my skin and waist size and nose dimple say I am but rather that issimply part of the shell of the person I really am? Could I come to love that person? Doesn’t that person deserve to feel love and acceptance?

What if I decided to dance in the kitchen or to be silly or to wear my favorite skirt even if I look ridiculous? What would happen other than my heart exploding with happiness and my children witnessing a confident mother?

So…

I’ve made a big decision folks…I’ve decided to be happy.

Happy with me. Happy with who I am. Happy with the girl God made me as. Just happy.

Despite what my scale says or the size of shirt I purchase. I will be happy because God loves me and made me.

I started writing this all a few weeks ago when I made the decision and yet something stopped me from posting immediately. I was instantly scared of what my old friends would say. I was intimidated by people not thinking I’m perfect (not that I ever have been!). But in the past few weeks I’ve found myself simply working through those feelings rather than cowering behind them like the old me may have done.

Now I am focusing on being happy with my family. Exercising with them. Making healthy foods that support my children’s brains and bodies to make them the healthiest they can be I’m happy being a mom, a wife, a friend, and a sister simply through being me.

I’ve made a big decision and I hope it inspires you to start looking at yourself differently to see how truly loved you are…just they way you are.

It feels so good to make the decision to be happy!

The Secret Place to go if you're a stressed out Mom...

Are you a stressed Momma on the verge of a break down?  You know what I mean. We all reach that place at some point where we just don't know if we can do it (by it meaning, anything!) anymore.   

There's a place that I promise will help you.  You need to run there, now! 

It's the gym. 

Wahhh???? 

I was reminiscing the other day while on the tread mill.  There was a time that I would go to the gym with tears streaming down my face, not knowing if I could make it another day.  Literally. 

Autism is hard y'all.  You can understand that somewhat, but unless you go through it, you don't really know what I am talking about.  

The screaming.  The tantrums.  The round and round arguments that convince you you are going insane.  Watching your child suffer, knowing you can't undo anything.  It's a hard and brutal momma life.   

Too often than not I found myself with my husband out of town, juggling homeschooling two kids, and not being able to look down the barrel of autism.  

Can I share something with you here? I remember a day when I was at my breaking point and I found myself going to the treadmill.  I had so much emotion being held inside that I couldn't really remember how I had gotten on the treadmill or to the treadmill, I just knew I was there. I wanted to run away truthfully but that treadmill and that place kept me there. I just didn't want to do it anymore.  I hope that doesn't sound lame or contrite but in that moment, I had had enough.  I wasn't cut out for this mom business, I thought.  But then my head started to clear.   I ran and ran, harder than I ever had and came to the realization: 

The gym will be my place. 

Of course, every gym has their own set of amenities and rules but here's the deal with ours: 

I can put the kids in child care there for up to two hours at a time.  I am sure this is with the idea you are going to go workout but no one asks.  

There's a cafe area, a pool, a gym, and free wifi.  

What I thought was that the gym was the place I needed to be at when I was on my last nerve but I eventually found myself dragging all of us there for some peace so I wouldn't have to enter "on my last nerve" territory.  

I would take the kids to the child care and sometimes I would go and work out. There is nothing like working out to help clear your head.  I remember once when I was dealing with some pretty tough post-partum stuff I called my dad (who's a pastor).  He listened to me rant for I don't know how long and then quietly he said "Linds, you need to go work out." And ladies, he was right!  The hormones and chemicals are so much reset by working out! 

Sometimes though (gasp), I wouldn't.  I would go sit in the hot tub or take a long shower, or read the bible in the cafe, or work on my blog in peace.  You guys, the gym over the years has been my saving grace.  

Whether you have a child with special needs or not, all of us mommas reach a point where we are broken and weary and need a break.  We need grace and understanding and Jesus.  We also sometimes just need someone else to watch our kids so we can have some us time.  It's okay. It's acceptable.  It's required.  

So go to the gym.  Find a gym that has useful things for your kids and for yourself.  Find something that works for your family.  I know our gym membership is cheaper than me paying a babysitter for four hours.  Taking my kids to child care one day a week for two hours each month is more than worth the membership...not to mention all of the other times we use the facility. 

When you are a momma at home struggling and alone, the world can be a scary place.  I get it!  Please, don't ever hesitate to reach out (to me, I'm here!) if you need someone to talk to, to pray with you, to love on you, or just to be there.  

You're worth it, you deserve it, now go to the gym. 

Review: Conner Prairie

Each school year we enter into the sacred time with new hopes and expectations for the future.  It's always a feeling of excitement and with fervor we rush into the newness of our schedules: armed with the unspoken promise that our efforts will indeed bring forth a new era of accomplishment into our lives.  

Each year as a homeschooling family we try to carve time out of our schedules for two field trips each month for the duration of our school year.  Sometimes we fail, other times we flourish.  No matter what the future within our new year may bring, for the past several years our inaugural field trip has been to a place that has never failed to invoke a feeling of wonder and to evade our schooling with excitement. 

What is this place?  

It's Conner Prairie.  

Located in the heart of Indiana (which is the heart of the Midwest, keenly inside the heart of the heart) is a place that has evolved over the years into something nothing short of magical.  

We had the joy of being hosted this year by Conner Prairie in exchange for this, my own words about the place called Conner Prairie.  

First let me tell you about our trip this year: 

The Prairie opens each day at 10 am so we planned to be there right at the beginning.  Arriving in the morning is always so fun because the animals haven't met the full heat of the day yet.  We found frolicking lambs, squealing piglets, and playful kids (in the goat variety) wherever we turned.  While we are not strangers to the barnyard scene, we certainly are not accustomed to it on a daily basis.  Conner Prairie's farm life comes in just the perfect way...lots of experts to explain things and buckets of hand sanitizer.  

After saying hello to the animals we scoped out our map and decided that Treetop Outpost was the next place for us.  

The thing I love the most about the Treetop Outpost (or the treehouse as my kiddos call it) are the amount of activities there are to do within the area.  Kids with varying interests can enjoy different activities at the same time while mom is nearby.  Our kids are 10 and 12 and I love letting them wonder through the Outpost without me, giving them a sense of adventure and independence while mom is waiting at the bottom for their return.  

After lots of fun running, making music, digging, and exploring we decided to partake in a Make and Take craft.  For only $5 per child they were each able to construct a wooden treasure box.  We adore Conner Prairie's crafts because they are solid objects that the kids can take home and treasure.  I always walk away amazed by what they were able to construct and at how much of a value each craft is. 

If you decide to do a make and take craft, be sure to make it a point to talk to the workers who oversee the crafts; they truly are a plethora of knowledge from the history of Conner Prairie to the best places to eat once you leave, I've had some very interesting and insightful conversations with these wonderful people.  You can tell that they are deeply invested in Conner Prairie and not just an employee.  

Our day progressed and as the heat intensified I felt we were slowing down, like a little family moving through glue.  

We stopped to play in a tug of war game in the Prairietown area outside of the general store we explored.  

After that I was losing Cal.  Most of you know he has High Functioning Autism.  We reach a point where enough is enough and he just needs some quiet and alone time.  

Last year was when I discovered Conner Prairie has these Quiet Spots.  I adore that they don't have just one but several throughout the prairie.  Because let's be real, can be worse than trying to move a child in a full panic all the way across the complex to a quiet area. I've done that at other places and let me tell you, it's not fun.  I counted no less than 5 Quiet Spots on the Conner Prairie map but there could be more.  I can't say enough about these areas you guys...they are a godsend! 

We found one right on the edge of the town by the restrooms and for a momma in crisis mode it is a dream come true...quiet, well lit, cold, with a box of sensory resources to use.  I am highly impressed by Conner Prairie's attention to detail in this department.  Weighted blankets and fidget toys are calming for us and they had both.  Amazing, you guys! 

After our break we refueled (Conner Prairie allows outside food to be brought in) and then we headed out to the Civil War Journey area.  

If you have older kids learning about the Civil War, this is such an ideal destination.  First of all, let's be real, there just aren't many field trips you can find within Indiana, or the Midwest for that matter, about the Civil War.  And while it was very neat for us in the past to travel to places like Gettysburg or Savannah to learn about the civil war history there, in reality it's just not practical in most time frames of life.  

The Conner Prairie Civil War area does an amazing job of transporting you back in time by having you walk across a real covered bridge to enter.  There are a couple fairly intense representations of Civil War action, a house to explore, and more!  

With the heat in the mid-nineties when we visited we also enjoyed their new splash pad, and their new water play feature (again, we stayed here forever because this is always super calming for Cal).  

Conner Prairie is located in Fishers, Indiana, which sits as a cute little hat on top of Indianapolis.  It is very close to the interstates and very convenient to get to.  I think it would be impossible to make it through everything in one day (we only covered two and a half areas this trip!).  Below is a carousel of photos from a previous trip we had to Conner Prairie, just to give you a look at other things they offer: Tomahawk throwing, Fun Science activities (indoors and out!), the William Conner house (that started the entire place!), there is so much to do.  

If you are a homeschooler and would love to visit, I have good news!  

They offer various homeschool activities throughout the year that are focused on an indepth look at various sciences or historical eras.  Water filtration, civil rights, and lunar landers are some of the topics on their calendar. 

And every August and September they offer special homeschool days so homeschool families can come at the field trip price without the amount of students a field trip normally consists of!

You can read all about their homeschool programs and their upcoming homeschool day here.  

I hope you enjoyed our little tour and review!  We love Conner Prairie and we know you will too!

The Bag All Mommas Need Now!

You're a mom so you're always are bringing tons of bags with you.  Am I right?  You've got a bag for snacks, a bag with some school work in it, a bag with some games in it. Does this sound like you?  Plus let's not forget your purse because, of course you need that! 

Girl, have I got the solution for you and since I've found this out it has been a game changer for me.  

The answer?  

A Diaper Bag! 

it's true!  Even if you don't have a kiddo in diapers anymore, you need to get yourself one of these bags.  

If you're like me, when your kiddos were done with diapers you wanted to throw your bag in some firepit and walk away, all gangster style like on Office Space.  

But now you can go back to the bag...it will be okay.  I promise.

Our kids are 10 and 12 and I carry a diaper bag. Every.Single.Day.  

Now before you think I've gone off and lost my cotton picking mind...let me explain myself.  

Tons of pockets and zippers and compartments.  

Most diaper bags these days have a waterproof pouch. Maybe these were made for wet clothes but you can now use them for snacks.  Something spills or sweats or leaks?  No biggie.  A contained mess in a wipeable area is aces.  

There is a place for a changing pad.  Take that out. You don't need that anymore.  You're above that.  You owned that.  See?  You're left with a pretty ample sized pocket.  I use this to store a binder or my planner.  And suddenly it's like I'm some kind of organizational wizard.  

Bottle holders on the sides?  Hello water bottles!  Or sunglasses!  Or your cell phone! 

I'm telling you all, diaper bags are not just for diapers.  They should just be called mom bags from the beginning because they can hold so many things.  And you don't need to have a diaper bag with monkeys on the print or whatever you may have had before.  You can have a cute bag that will hold everything you need it to...I kid you not!  

Once I let go of the idea that I needed my own bag and then a bag for school work and a container for snacks, and a container for this and a container for that...once I could let that go I was able to accept the idea of a bag for me, as a mom.  I am my own person but I am also ultimately a mother who carries the weight (literally!) of bringing things with us so instead of 27 different bags I've been diligent in finding a cute bag that suits my personality and the stage of life I'm in.  

I have a stylish Coach diaper bag in a pretty blue color.  This color is not the norm for Coach bags and I get so, so many compliments about it.  The great part?  We went to a baseball game recently and I was able to comfortably store food for my kids in it...I had 4 sodas, 2 bags of chips, 7 cookies, and two baseball hats.  I'm for real here...this is why you need a diaper bag! 

Here are some of my favorite bags...some of these I have and others are on my shopping want list! Like I said, I love these bags.  Almost all of the "purses" I carry around these days are actually diaper bags. 

Maybe one day I'll have a smallish purse again but for our life right now these work great! 

This sweet bag is on my Amazon wish list. I have friends who have this bag and I've heard rave reviews from other CC tutors who use it to bring their books to community day. I love that it can be carried as a tote or a backpack! And the color is on point. So adorable.

I have this bag and really love it for vacations! It can become a cross body or a hobo style bag with adjusting the straps. It holds tons of snacks and provides a really soft cushiony case for my DSLR. So versatile!

I don't have this striped bag but I have this in a black version and it is easily my favorite bag of all time! It has been so many places with me and I have been able to take so much with me because of this bag! The top zippered compartment is perfect for cell phone storage...it's great for people like me who lose everything and need a place for everything! Also, when my sister dumped an entire cup of coffee on my purse it cleaned up beautifully!

This bag is similar to my coach baby bag although the pattern of mine has been discontinued. I love the removable strap...I use it a lot when we are out of town or have a lot to lug around and then usually take it off for every day use.

So those are my favorite mom bags (aka diaper bags I guess). If you have a favorite way of carrying all of the mom stuff around be sure to comment below and keep all of us friends in the know, too!

ALSO! Make sure to hunt at any children’s resale events you go to for diaper bags. It’s one of my favorite places to find bags. I’ve snagged some before for just a few bucks and they were brand new!

Happy shopping and toting all of your stuff around, friends! XO 

A New Start for Momma with the New School Year

I love Back-to-School time, don't you? 

The smell of fresh pencils, new crayons, and fresh starts hangs in the air like the smell after a spring rain.  

And it doesn't help that my kiddos are always so stinkin' cute on our first day of school!  They are so sweet and always let me take loads of photos of them in their cute little outfits.  I am very thankful for a little girl who actually still wanted to wear her outfit from last year that still fit (can she stay little forever, please?).  

It's so easy to usher this time of year through like all of the other times (after all, we're all a tad bit sick of the heat by now and are just waiting for the coolness of Autumn, can I get an amen?) but I think it is such a great time to have a restart.  A pause, a change, a reversal of what we don't like going on in our lives and a time for things to start new in a fresh direction.  

I have always felt like this.  When I was a kid I was a super nerd (fitting as now I'm super busy!) and would ponder and think and obsess over what "theme" my school supplies would be for the year.  After all, the image you're setting out for the world as a fourth grader is super important stuff.  Ha. 

I remember one year I wanted to be super traditional in the mindset that that would somehow project a super serious study ethic onto myself...I insisted on a plaid fabric trapper keeper, straight yellow pencils (no designs, gasp!), and the plainest backpack we could find.  I was going to nail school to the wall.  

Then there was the one year I was going to be the Punky Brewster of Mrs. Grass' third grade class.  Kids would want to be me.  All unicorns, all glitter, all the time.  

Obviously this whole "new school year, new me" thing has been with me for a while.  I love starting a new routine, a new schedule, with new, sometimes over inflated, expectations for myself.  Some I am amazing at.  Some I completely miss.  And that's okay.  It's a time to tweak what works, to learn more about myself and to understand what I truly love in life.  It's also a good time for me to set goals for myself as a mother, a wife, a friend, a sister. 

What goals are you making this year?  

Want to know mine? 

1. Read my Bible

The legit bible.  Not someone's take on the bible. Not instagram quotes about the bible but the fleshed out, living word, Bible. If you don't have a bible you love, maybe it's time for a new one.  My parent's bought me a bible once in college.  I wanted to love that thing so bad...but in the end the chapter I was in and the book of the bible were printed all the way half way into the page, making it wonky and almost impossible to thumb through to find what I was looking for.  In the end a new bible can sometimes solve problems like this, put you more at ease in the book, and help jumpstart you into a fresh start.  Here's one that I love. 

2. Take Better Care of Me

About the time that school was getting to let out in the spring I noticed, gee I've let my self care slide big time.  I acknowledged it but didn't really know how to change. Thankfully at the beginning of the summer I had a dear friend, Heather, smack some sense into me and pretty much drag me into a Pilates class.  In that class I finally got it...it's okay to take time for myself to say, you know what?  I am worthy of this.  I deserve this.  I need this.  Since then I've continued going when I can to classes, I've taken up educating myself on things that are important to me (like family time, healthful eating and how to work at a marriage), bought myself flowers, and made time for me to just be me.

It feels great and I plan on making sure I carve time out of our school schedule to be sure I have time for things that matter to me. Some days I have more time than on other days but even if it's just five minutes to pick up a book, fling myself on the bed and read, I try to make a mental note that I am taking a small break to unwind and have me time.  It really does help and makes me feel more gratitude towards our life.   

3. Stop Being Lazy

In my taking better care of me time I've been reading the book Hoodwinked: Ten Myths Moms Believe & Why We All Need to Knock It Off by Karen Ehman & Ruth Schwenk.    In this book it really takes the time to explain about laziness well.  First of all it describes the act of possessing wisdom not only as the ability to have information but in turn the ability to rightly use that information. In other words, skilled living.  If I have the information needed to keep a house but am not doing so, am not being skilled in my ability to live then therefore I am lacking in the wisdom department.  

It has been such an eye opening book!  

It also went to talk about the second chapter of Titus which, girl, you know I love since my very blog's name came from that verse!  Preach!

“Bid the older women similarly to be reverent and devout in their deportment as becomes those engaged in sacred service, not slanderers or slaves to drink. They are to give good counsel and be teachers of what is right and noble.

So that they will wisely train the young women to be sane and sober of mind and to love their husbands and their children,

To be self-controlled, chaste, homemakers, good-natured, adapting, and subordinating themselves to their husbands, that the word of God may not be exposed to reproach. ”

— Titus 2:3-5

The book discusses how the passage calls us to be homemakers or "keepers of the home".  It doesn't matter whether you work or are a stay at home mom, the fact of the matter is that God has called us to manage homes and those things which have been placed in our charge.  Being busy at home means not being busy and idle.  Not just pittering about the house all day without seeing anything being accomplished.  Instead we are to take care of our homes and families.  Truth!  

How many times I get behind on things because I am looking at Pinterest or browsing a magazine, rather than staying diligent in my house work.  How many times I have felt discouragement and the feeling of confidence in myself lacking because I have let me chores slide and I find myself in a pit of never-ending drudgery.  

Well enough is enough.  The banishment of laziness will begin now!

We're looking forward to our new school year.  We are doing the homeschool program, Classical Conversations again this year.  Emma is moving up to the Challange A Program and Cal will be in Foundations and Essentials.  Each year brings new challenges and new opportunities with our cute crew and we pray you'll have a great year too! 

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Comment below what goals you have this year...I'd love to be praying for you!