Faith

A Rough Day and Remembering God's Blessings

Yesterday was rough.  At 9 in the morning Emma and I went out to shovel (Cal was sick in bed with the stomach flu) and I just had to measure it.  Nick was at work half an hour south of us and reported when I called that they had only a light dusting and some flurries.  But at home we had 7 inches!  When he left home at 6 he said it was just a few flurries and nothing on the ground which means that in 3 hours we had 7 inches of snow fall. Unbelievable!  Well, I wish I could say unbelievable but truthfully this is the way it is in Northern Indiana.  The weather comes to us from over Lake Michigan and all of this was lake effect snow.  
Welcome to Indiana :) 

I didn't mind shoveling aside from the fact that once we were done brushing off cars and mailboxes and shoveling walkways and driveways, you couldn't even tell we had done anything because it had snowed so much more. Great.  

Then I had to drop Emma off unexpectedly for her to attend the symphony with friends.  I saw multiple school buses in accidents trying to drop kiddos off at the same events.  The roads were ice covered and terrible.  

I realized I forgot to pay a bill the day before that was due. 

I remembered I needed to order Christmas cards from a place with REALLY expensive christmas cards who was offering free cards...only to see that the code had expired and I was late. 

I screamed at Calvin and then we sobbed together.  

My final crushing blow was melting something in the dryer.  I thought I had stuck it in with no heat but I guess I didn't and my item is ruined.  I called the manufacturer 4 times speaking with different departments but alas, they don't sell the replacement pieces seperately.  Or even have them at all.  A search on ebay and online produced nothing either.  So I sulked.  

Then I cried.  

Then I texted Nick "I've failed you as a wife and mother.  I'm leaving you all now,  Good bye." 

I'm thankful I've got the husband I have because Nick texted back "go do your devotions...now.  God always meets you in the bible right where you need."  

And of course he is right.  

Duh. 

And my day did get better because even though this could be bad...
 It brought this in the late afternoon, along with lots of hot cocoa breaks and laughing:
 There are times that it feels like God is practically shouting...

"I love you, Silly Goose!  See?  I told you I would provide!  Your patience pays off!  Just trust me already!"

And Monday we saw one of those times.  See these beauties?  These were the EXACT tiles I wanted for the fireplace front two years ago when we painted the living room.  But they are $16 a square foot.  We were shopping at Lowe's and I saw them sticking out behind some other piles of tiles.  (say piles of tiles three times fast...go! Bleh) They were on clearance for $3 a square foot!  There were ten squares of them!  So we loaded up the cart and hauled them to the front.  The edges were kind of ragged and Nick asked if they could knock off any more on the price.  The sales clerk took them down to $1 a square foot!  Unbelievable!  We looked when we got home and we might have to order one more sheet of them but other than that we have enough to do the entire fireplace!  How amazing is that?  Granted we waited two years but the patience paid off.  And if we end up needing 11 sheets, what originally would have been a $176.00 project will now cost us $26.00!  I just can't believe how amazing God's favor is!
My last piece of awesome-sauce news is that we have a legal team that is going up against our insurance company about Calvin...for what will be free for us!  I am so speechless.  It is just something we never could have imagined except in our wildest dreams.  It's a huge long story and I'm not sure how much of this I'm allowed to speak of but for now just know that God is providing.  And yesterday, through small glass tiles He reminded me again, that he is in charge of the little and the big.  It may not be my time or choice but He will always be there and is always working for the good of those who love Him.

So here's to today.  I'm so thankful that God's mercies are new in the morning.  I get a second chance!  May it be better than yesterday.  May we be able to block out the thoughts that we can't do this.  And May we be able to focus on the good rather than the bad.

Now go do your devotions...now!  :)

Kicking Satan to the Curb After Moms' Night Out

Last night my good friend, Amber, invited me to a Mom's event at her church.  It was so cute!  They had an adorable popcorn bar and little bottles of water.  It was such a neat idea.  



This is the movie we watched. If you haven't watched it or heard of it allow me to congratulate you for finally coming out from under your rock.  This was the second time I've watched it and it is so, so funny.  If you ever want to feel like someone else just get's you then you need to see this movie. Go.now.  I'll wait...
 Growing up as a Pastor's Kid I totally related to the Pastor's Daughter.  And I can totally get the main character.  I mean,the woman homeschool's for pete's sake...it's like she's a friend of mine and doesn't know it yet!  
One of my favorite scenes from the movie is the one in jail.  I love the quote below said by Trace Adkins' character: 
On the way home I was thinking of how great and how sad this event was.  I mean, about 100 mother's came together who all have at one time or another (or every single day) felt like a complete and utter failure in this job of motherhood God has given us to do.  

How sad is that?  

I got to thinking of why we find ourselves beating ourselves up, unable to find satisfaction in our "job performance".  Unable to feel happy in this life we wanted for ourselves.  

At first I thought it was society.  And to an extent it is...pinterest, facebook, instagram...we moms need look no further than our phones and laptops to find other moms seemingly doing this journey through motherhood better dressed, smarter, cleaner, and more organized.  

What a world this is.  But even more than that I think there is an underlying cause.  He's always there...it's Satan.  

When I realized that it was kind of a "duh" moment for me. 

 After all John 10:10 says " The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy.  I came that they may have life and have it abundantly." 

 I read this blog a while ago which had spoken of this, but somehow over time I had forgotten how it happens.  (It's a wonderful read and all moms should read it! Go now.  I'll wait... :) )

And there it is.  So clear.  With the press of facebook when I feel imperfect and lonely throughout the day, I am opening the door to let Satan come on in and take my joy.  He steals from me and destroys my confidence and kills and thought that I could ever do this mom thing right in the first place.  He gets me right where he wants me.  

But here's a thought... what if I can fend him off?  What if my children could just have me do what God made me to do and see joy on my face as I live life as their Momma?  Well that would be living out the promise God gives in the second part of the verse...I would have life and would be living abundantly. And I wouldn't be living just for me but my daughter would be seeing how much joy motherhood brings.  

 And so with the help of movie night my sweet friend invited me to, I've come to realize what I need to do...I need to be more vigilant in watching for Satan's attacks.  I need to show joy in being a Mom.  I need to serve the Lord through scrubbing toilets, changing under-jams, and making beds.  And I want to encourage you too.  Just think, if we could stop the devil in his tracks with this, we might spare our girls from growing up feeling these same crummy thoughts of not being good enough. Not being able to get in front of it. Always being a failure.

That is something I will gladly do.  In Jesus' name!

Love you all!  :)